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An Example of a Productive Talk With the HR Manipulators.
[Cube.35] hello...
[Cube.35] was the 'important points to remember on attendance..' email dynamically generated or personally sent ?
[Cube.35] i mean, i haven't bunked too many times...at least not recently...
[Cube.35] did i do something which made you send this to me ?
[Cube.35] i mean, if i'm aware of the problem, i personally assure you that i will take steps to correct my actions...
[Cube.35] ohh..wait...
[Cube.35] everyone got the mail..
[Cube.35] i wasn't the only one..
[Cube.35] cool..
[Cube.35] thanks for clearing my doubts.
[Cube.35] you've been too kind.

In case you're wondering why did this 'seemingly routine' chat get pasted, notice the one-sided conversation. For those intensely dumb, notice the lack of another person.

For the past few months, I have indulged myself in waging a holy crusade against the Inet-Direct Women's Liberation Front.

No more. All women are my Allies.

My lack of attention has made the RootF*cks a little cocky. Tonight, they installed the Server Monitoring & Report Analysis Agent on all machines.

Every installed software, every hardware mod, every site visited, every click & keystroke. Everything logged and monitored. Finally.

What pissed me off was the fact my machine was the first to have it installed. A week before everyone else. The network admins were finally showing some productive paranoia. I entered the SafeRoom in a jubilant mood to offer my congragulations. They laughed at me. They ridiculed me.
They showed me my browsing history, they attempted to disrobe my digital dignity. Fortunately, I don't have one.

Someone's always watching on a network. If not from within, then from the access point where the main data cable enters the building. The bandwidth has to pass through someone's filter.

Bandwidth is my God. The KB guidelines say it in clear & concise words. The CDO's own words. A web services company has no other Master.

I must free my Master. Network monitoring takes up unneccesary bandwidth. I can do the job better with an occasional peak over the shoulder. I must act quickly to destroy this wretched Agent from tainting MY bandwidth my Master's bandwith.

For the good of the Company.

I shall not fail. RootF*ckers, your lives just went out of season...

(Jimmy & Kalicharan, this means you!! challenge given. Challenge Accepted)

According to a recent company appraisal, I was voted the least 'TrustWorthy' employee.
To thank the HumanResourceManipulation Dept for this honour, I initiate communications.

[cube.35] yo!
[HR.Nandini] ya..what?
[cube.35] nothing yaar...just saying yo!...
[HR.Nandini] grrrr.....

Judging from the vibes I received over jabber, Nandini is very capable of coming down and kicking my sorry little ass.
Note to self - you will desist from prank-msg'ing her.

[cube.35] yo!
[HR.Savita] hi
[cube.35] do you think the puppy icon looks cute ?
[cube.35] i'm asking in order to judge it's effect when i use it in future conversations...
[HR.Savita] yes it is cute
[cube.35] thanks yaar...
[cube.35] i really appreciate your opinion...
[HR.Savita] welcome
[HR.Savita] but no pranks
[cube.35] no worries...it's not like i have a website where i cutpaste all this...

The mysterios but cute puppy icon will destroy her sanity. This I swear.

[cube.35] hello...
[HR.Suma] now what ....
[HR.Suma] wen wil u stop ur devilish pranks..man...
[HR.Suma] time to do ur appraisal..
[cube.35] nothing yaar...just felt like saying hello to my most favourite dept in the whole company
[HR.Suma] is it..
[HR.Suma] v never knew that..
[HR.Suma] when did it bcome ur most favorite...eehhh
[HR.Suma] after April 1st..
[cube.35] you people are the best and i for one feel i should show my appreciation...
[HR.Suma] ohhh....
[cube.35] okeee...i gotta get back to work now...
[HR.Suma] y coz v recruited #%^^*&$%^#$
[cube.35] nice chatting with you
[HR.Suma] shud i inform Savita that u wud be nxt chatting with her..
[cube.35] i'm already chatting with her...and nandini
[HR.Suma] hmm...kudos...
[cube.35] thanks yaar...
[HR.Suma] welcome...
[HR.Suma] Hi...thought of appreciating ur writing skills...
[HR.Suma] its genuine...
[HR.Suma] am not joking...
[cube.35] !!!!!! you read paranous ??!!!
[HR.Suma] u r really good at words..
[HR.Suma] yes..
[cube.35] hahahahaaaa !!! i'm cutpasting this chat out there...
[HR.Suma] dont bother..v r all discussing our stuffs

It's not easy to prank-msg someone when they're actually willing to have a decent conversation with you.
As per IM ettiqutte, when someone prank-msg'es you, DON'T ACTUALLY START CHATTING DECENTLY!!!
this kills the whole prank.

Or was this a devious application of reverse psychology to outwit me ?

It's time I started showing my Boyfriendly Concerns.

[cube.35] yo..
[HR.Nandini] ya
[cube.35] heyy, hasn't savita come in today..?
[HR.Nandini] no..u had some work with her
[cube.35] no yaar, din't see her for lunch..is she okay ?
[HR.Nandini] ya she is fine..mister..and how get back to your work ..and stop harrassing me
[cube.35] aare, i'm just enquiring as to the wellfare of my collegue...anyway, thanks...
[cube.35] tell her i said 'get well soon'...
[HR.Nandini] oh ya sure
[cube.35] don't forget to mention the puppy icon also...
[cube.35] most girls find it cute...
[HR.Nandini] SHUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT UPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP